ADAM & EVE
It was a pleasant day outside.. the first week of monsoon.. the sky was covered by grey clouds and the green earth was all wet and washed. I wore my favorite little black dress and went out for a walk down the avenue. Down the street I saw a group of young boys chanting and laughing with each other. But one boy was like a popular one.. the centre of their circle. Average looking, fair skin, hair nicely set like that of a gentleman, smile like a lively sunshine, and eyes like burnt amber- deep. Mischievous by nature he was. No wonder he was like a prince among knights.
A little far from this group I saw a little girl of the same age as that boy. Plump body, dreamy eyes like a black mirror, innocent face.. wearing a yellow little dress and white shoes to go with it. Simple and elegant. Silent and alone she stood staring at that lively boy. I could make out from a distance that there was something more than just attraction. I went nearby and smiling I said “hello”. She looked at me with confusion in her eyes. She didn’t say anything. Probably she can’t decide if she should talk to a stranger or not. Then after a pause she replied “hello”. The expressions of her face turned from “confusion” to “confidence”. Confident little girl she was.
“Do u like that boy?” I asked her. Her gaze shifted from my face to that boy and while looking at him she replied: “I don’t know.” .. Then I asked her: “does that boy like you??”... This time she turned to look at me. She said looking right into my eyes: “I don’t know.”… I read a disappointment on her face... as if she knew. May be I knew the answer as well. Yet looking into her eyes gave me a sense of satisfaction that she knows the truth in her heart. So I asked her: “why not?”...
“May be .. Because I’m ugly.” she said.
Her answer answered everything.
“You’re not ugly sweetheart. You’re simple and so you’re better than everyone.” I said cheering her up.
.. She looked at me as if they were just sympathy words.
To distract that look in her eyes I said: ‘I saw you were looking at him.” .. her gaze shifted to him again. He was laughing at something he shared with his friends, his laugh sent a smile on the girl’s face too. With that faint but lovely smile she said: “I’m trying to know him.” ..
.. “Okay. .. I gotta be going now.” I said and asked her name.
She replied: “ My name is Evangelina. You can call me EVE.”
“Ok eve, I’ll see you around” saying this I moved on.
A few months later I walked down the street again. I saw her. She was smiling. Lost in herself.. Dreaming. I screamed out loud: “hey eve!! Howz you?? & hows your adam??” .. her smile grew bigger and her dreamy eyes started twinkling like stars. Happily she replied: “hey. He’s good.” .. she skipped “howz you?”& replied only to “hows adam?” .. and I sensed she was in love with her adam.
“Are you two friends now??” I asked her smiling:
.. she nodded and said: “yes! .. sort of.”
Some days passed. Weather was getting better. Cool breeze flowing all over.. I decided to go out and the first thing that crossed my mind was the same street “la rue memoir”. I saw the same group. But there were little changes. It was now a “group of friends” with both girls and boys. That boy was no more the prince among the knights, yet the most charming one. Eve was in the group too. And the boy was insulting her about some matter. I read little sadness on her face, obviously she was feeling bad. I waved my hand towards her. Seeing me she rushed towards me with her same innocent smile.
“whats the matter? Why was he humiliating you?” I asked reading the sadness of her face.
She was almost in tears but she controlled herself. She replied: “he does this all the time so that others don’t think the wrong way. I think they all know my feelings for him but I don’t know how they came to know about it. I see he gets as sense of satisfaction when he does so. He feels good. So if that makes him happy, I’m fine with it.” ..
“No honey, he doesn’t understand your feelings, he doesn’t consider you as a friend.. that is why he hurts you like this.. don’t get yourself hurt.” Saying this I hugged her. And then she ran back to the group.
A few years passed. I thought of visiting eve again. This time she was sitting on a bench in a public park nearby. Her adam was nowhere to be seen. She had the same sad face but her eyes were no-more dreamy. She had grown into a beautiful young lady. She was busy reading a book. I tip-toed to her and sat by her side. This time she was not surprised to see me; she behaved as if I was meeting her everyday. I asked her: “what are you reading?” ..
With her eyes still in the book she replied: “I’m trying to make a future out of myself.” .. “hows ur adam?”
“I don’t know. He’s gone.” She replied in a monotonous tone and her eyes were still busy reading.
“Did you tell him? About your feelings for him?” ..
“NO” she said. ..
“Because I know he doesn’t like me. Because I know that it’s a “NO”.. because I still don’t wanna lose him. Even if as a friend, he will be near. Although he hasn’t changed much. But I’m still hoping that he will change one day.”
This time she was looking right into my eyes. That confident little kid was still somewhere there. What she said confidently expressed her fear hidden deep in her heart.
I don’t know if this was a wrong way but this surely was not a right one… she needed to face her fears, she needed to face the truth. So I said: “If it’s already a “no” then what are you scared of?? You cannot lose something you never had. I’m really sorry if that sounds too frank but the sooner you’re aware of it the better it will be for you. Go tell him what you feel about him even if he knows this already. If it’s a “No” then you get a confirmation and you can move on but if it’s a “yes” then you get everything and you can start on.”
She was listening to me very carefully.. Thinking about all that I said she replied: okay. .. and I smiled back to her.
After a few days I met her again. Seeing me she burst out in tears. She said weeping: “I told him. I told him everything, I told him I never wanted to be the most beautiful girl but I wanted to be something to him. I tried to write down a few words in a poetic way to make him feel special. I was scared, but I was prepared to lose him even as a friend. So I asked him not to call me if he’s mad at me.”
I hugged her warmly.. I could feel the little girl’s pain.. I enquired from her about what the guy answered. Wiping off her tears she replied: “things went opposite. He said he’s not mad for what I feel.. he said I deserve someone much better but he’s not the one I deserve. He insisted on still being friends. I thought he’ll shout and leave. But he stayed. I donno what should I do.” .. as she spoke her eyes were on me. They were searching for a way-out, for some words of hope. They were filled with pain, restlessness, and tears.
Comforting her I said: “Now when you’re still his friend then probably you should try to know him more. Try to know his friends too. Give him some time to understand you. Give him some space too. But don’t give in all your life if he can not see your love for him.” .. and she hugged me back.
There was some unknown connection between me and eve. I knew she needed me but I could not visit her frequently. A few years went by and then one Sunday I finally got some time. Taking advantage of the free hour I went to see her. She was waiting for a bus. “Let’s talk” I said. Her face was now well composed, calm, and mature. She was much more beautiful now.. Like a butterfly grew from a caterpillar. She was not plump anymore, not simple anymore. She looked like a princess. “Sure!” she said in the sweetest tone. Her voice was like velvet.. We sat on the same bench in the same public park “le jardin publique”.. “So what’s up? Hows your adam??” …
Replying with the familiar faint smile she said: “I don’t know.” .. “I sent him a letter saying I forgive him for all that he did and I don’t wish to continue with any friendship. It was not really a friendship. It was more of a pile on. I was the one who always called him or sent him texts. He would reply, but I always wondered if he ever felt the need to call me by himself. I made friends with many of his friends. They knew I had feelings for him. They told me that I don’t deserve him. He’s been lying to me a lot, yet I ignored his lies. He has broken other people’s relationships for his own “feel good factor”..He’s even betted on girls. He used to humiliate me so that I go away. He’s even taken advantage of friends. He did the same to me back in school. I understood it was all faux. What I felt for him never mattered. Whenever I made him feel special never mattered. He’s an opportunist. He doesn’t care about feelings. If I can love him, I can love another the same way.. But yes, he will never get a girl who would love him like me. He wrote me demanding an explanation for my letter. But this was the time I was really saying bye.”
I looked into her eyes while she said all this. Smiled.. and said “this is the first time you chose the right path.” .. Having said all I turned down the mirror and went to have a nap. But before closing my eyes I repeated again: “yes!! Dear Adam this time it’s me really saying bye to you. Love eve.”